Helen's Blog

How can anyone love you if you don’t love yourself first? It is trite, it is a cliché, and it is annoying when someone says it to you. If someone you respect and trust says this to you, take pause and listen to what they have to say. They have made this statement for a reason. Thoughts are real. Thoughts are things. What we think about ourselves comes across to others without us realizing it. Another oft quoted phrase, as a man thinks, so is he. That is why it is important to take a personal inventory one’s feelings before setting out to accomplish tasks, achieve goals or start a relationship.

When you meet that person and then they become your person, it is such a wonderful experience. The honeymoon period is filled with moments of excitement, romance, and bliss. The newness of everything can be quite intoxicating and all-encompassing. As your relationship develops, you continue to share more, trust more and your connection deepens. Before you know it, you and your person are like two peas in a blissful pod. There is nothing wrong with this and quite natural and necessary for relationships to blossom into sustainable, healthy relationships. However, at some point, you need to snap out of it and focus on what’s happening around you. There are other people and things that you need to pay attention to in life. While it is wonderful to be coupled up, it is also just as important to be your own person. That’s where the phrase, independent together, comes into play. Putting the word independent with together is an oxymoron but it is meaningful. Sometimes people get so wrapped up in one another, they isolate themselves and let other important relationships or activities fall by the wayside. It is just as important to retain your own individuality while being in a relationship.

Writing to heal pain, putting your feelings on paper, helps you overcome obstacles, face challenges, solve problems and even repair and heal relationships. It enables you to move past your problems and get on with your life.